Frogs

Soft splats all around me, and I’d forgotten my umbrella again. I brushed a frog from my shoulder and reached down to dislodge another from the German shepherd. The poodle snapped at a falling amphibian. The Airedale just looked disgruntled. At least it wasn’t blood this time. The dogs had tracked that all over the house. The stains would probably never come off the floors.

I came up with this clever scheme after getting laid off: gullible people paying me up front for the security of knowing their pets would be cared for after the Rapture. Even good dogs don’t go to Heaven. Lots of them did pay me. Now I was stuck with the consequences: dogs, cats, hamsters. I’m glad I said no to the donkeys, even when their owner offered to pay double.

I thought I was so smart, but I don’t even like animals all that much.